Teen Wolf: Perishable (4×09)
by Elise Kulik
Can we take a moment for Hot Deputy Parrish? More importantly, can we take a moment for Hot, Shirtless Deputy Parrish?
This episode was more or less an Ode to Parrish, and I’m definitely not complaining. From surviving an assassination attempt at the beginning of the episode to saving Lydia and Stiles from Psycho Orderly, I’m nominating Parrish for Favorite Character of the Week.
Speaking of this week- it’s chock full of pyromaniac assassins- why these assassins all have a proclivity for fire as a means of death is beyond me, #PlotHole, but hey. To each assassin his own weird MO.
Parrish wakes up ziptied to a burning car, and we’re made to believe that he perishes in the fire (If the writers get to make the pun, so do I) before he shows up at the police station all charred and smoldery (okay, I’m done now, I promise) to beat the living hell out of his attacker, another officer at the sheriff’s office. So Parrish is… immortal? Flame resistant? Stay tuned.
From Liam’s printer going berserk and printing copies of the deadpool over and over again, we’re made to believe that a whole bunch of people are getting copies of the hit list; it’s not just professional assassins anymore. It’s also worth noting that Derek’s off the list now, but Liam’s value was upped to 18 million. Kinda glad, because if we’re losing any characters this season, I’d prefer to keep Derek around.
Meanwhile in Lydia Land, she’s trying to make sense of her grandmother’s death, or lack thereof.
If there’s one thing that I consistently admire about Teen Wolf, it’s this show’s ability to incorporate diverse characters into its cast. With the exception of killing off female leads *cough Allison cough*, this show does fairly well with POC and LGBTQ representation.
One such example of that representation is Lydia’s grandmother, Lorraine. Lorraine had a partner, Maddie, and Lorraine ended up predicting Maddie’s death. Afterward, Lorraine got in deep with learning about psychological, occult, and paranormal phenomena to try and explain her banshee abilities.
Eventually, the family brought in Meredith to help Lorraine, but the tests they performed on Mer drove her insane.
Lydia and Stiles puzzle over the bits of cipher Lorraine left, eventually cracking the code with the word ‘Ariel,’ because Lydia and her grandmother used to read The Little Mermaid together.
The new list includes Lorraine- and a number of other patients who committed suicide at Eichen House. Stiles and Lydia inadvisably rush off to investigate.
Meanwhile, back in high school teenage hijinks plot, there’s a massive bonfire party which Malia, Liam, and Scott are attending. Malia’s being fierce and awesome dancing on her own, because nobody needs Stiles’ paternalistic protection. She is getting drunk and she is looking hella good while doing it.
Scott, ever the downer, tells us that werewolves can’t get drunk #PlotPoint. Which is both strange and relevant, because soon the werewolves start getting drunk. The DJ apparently tired of his day job at the turntable playing sick beats for rowdy teenagers and instead decided to jump on the assassin train.
After the other wolves collapse, Scott confronts the assassins, who douse him in gasoline to light him on fire. Why they do this instead of shooting him because they have guns is beyond me.
Anyway, Derek and Braeden (woo Power!Couple) save the day and all’s well that ends doused in unlit gasoline.
Back at Eichen House, Creepy Orderly takes Stiles and Lydia into the record room to investigate the suicides… shortly before he admits to killing the patients himself and forcing Lydia to listen to her grandmother’s death on tape. Which is a bit twisted, even for this show.
He stabs Lydia in the neck with a needle, but right before he pushes the plunger, Parrish saves the day, killing the orderly. With Creepy Orderly’s dying breaths, we learn that he isn’t The Benefactor.
Someone walks around the corner, admitting to controlling the Orderly. Guess who?